August 4, 2013 by Minabere Ibelema (mibelema@bellsouth.net)
Minabere Ibelema
| credits: File copy
| credits: File copy
I am about to accomplish something that the mighty Albeit Einstein failed at, and that is to develop a unifying theory.
Einstein’s quest was to develop a unifying theory of the universe. How mundane!!! My quest is to develop a unifying theory of first ladies, a theory that will explain the phenomenon at all places at all times. Now, that is a weightier scientific undertaking.
The quest for a unifying theory of the universe eluded Einstein till his death in 1955 at the age of 76. All he left us with is a formula for energy, E=mc2. That’s so easy!!!
I am keeping Einstein’s failure in mind as I undertake this much grander quest, being cognisant that I too might fail. Still, I find comfort in knowing that even in his failure, Einstein received a Nobel Prize in physics. And he remains one of the most reputed persons in the history of science.
I expect no less for what is certain to be a successful quest. The Nobel Prize Committee just has to create a new category.
The inspiration for this quest is, of course, that Nigeria’s first lady, Patience Jonathan, has stirred so much passion across the land that the future of Nigeria may depend on our understanding of the phenomenon of first ladies.
And given the importance of Nigeria to the world, as articulated in this column last Sunday, this is a matter that has global implications.
In sundry corners in Nigeria, people are up in arms for or against our first lady. Such has been the acrimony that a modest proposal was made (perhaps in the tradition of Jonathan Swift) that she debate Nigeria’s only Nobel laureate to date, Wole Soyinka.
Had such a debate been consummated, it would have been quite a gladiatorial display, with the irrepressible dame taking on the cerebral curmudgeon. While the prospects tickled the fancy of quite a few rascals, it horrified the rest of humanity. It would have been a spectacle that would have made even ancient Roman gladiators wince.
So you see why Dame Patience has inspired this grand quest for a unifying theory that is unprecedented since Einstein’s death in 1955.
The first theory I considered in this pursuit is that the assertiveness of first ladies is inversely proportional to the kinetic power of the presidents.
As evidence, I predicted the rise of first lady Turai Yar’Adua after President Umaru Musa Yar’Adua took seriously ill and became comatose in 2010. Mrs. Yar’Adua wasn’t entirely invisible during her husband’s active tenure. Still, no one could have predicted her near usurpation of power while her husband lay dying in Saudi Arabia.
A similarly intriguing case played out in the US in the first half of the 20th century. It was then that a first lady first became less of a hostess of state occasions and more of an activist for causes.
Even now, the person who spurred the transformation, Eleanor Roosevelt, is still considered the most activist first lady in American history. And because of President Franklin D. Roosevelt’s 4-term tenure, she was also the longest serving (reigning, perhaps) first lady.
What makes the Yar’Aduas-Roosevelts comparison intriguing is the somewhat parallel situation between the first spouses. Unlike President Yar’Adua, President Roosevelt did not lie dying. However, he was stricken with polio, which left him crippled.
And so though Roosevelt remained in control and successfully led the US through much of World War II, Mrs. Roosevelt essentially became his executive assistant and spokesperson.
While the wheelchair-bound president had to make do with fireside chats that were broadcast on radio, Mrs. Roosevelt crisscrossed the country, conveying the White House’s messages in person and relaying public sentiments back to her husband. She was also an activist crusader for women, blacks and the poor.
During the war, she served as the assistant director of the Office of Civilian Defence, a position from which she recruited civilian volunteers for the war effort. During the Great Depression that preceded the war, President Roosevelt told Americans, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” Mrs. Roosevelt couldn’t have agreed more.
And so, though Roosevelt remained a charismatic and inspirational figure himself, it could be said that the first lady’s dynamism was a factor of his long tenure and success. She made up for the president’s disadvantage of being crippled. And so they make a strong case for the theory of inverse proportionality.
It could be argued that the same logic applies to the Jonathans, though the case of altruism is weak in Dame Patience’s activism.
While President Goodluck Jonathan is from all indications a healthy, dashing and relatively young man, there are quite a few who have penned him down as a weak president, if that’s the case, that would explain Dame Patience’s assertiveness and feistiness.
Alas, the claim that Jonathan is a weak president is at best a tenuous one. He inherited the presidency amidst a thunderstorm. Yet, in the tradition of the Ijaw, he has managed to swim through the crashing waves.
Jonathan succeeded Yar’Adua in May 2010 amidst fierce opposition and scheming. He got elected on his own just under a year later amidst even fiercer opposition. And now he is poised to get re-elected amidst the political equivalent of a hurricane. These are no little feats.
Much of the claim of Jonathan’s weakness derives from his reluctance to let loose on Boko Haram. He has now done that, quite effectively and with nearly universal support. Weakness is made of feebler stuff.
Still, just as Roosevelt remained a strong president while hobbled by polio, it could be said that Jonathan is a strong president who is hobbled by the political environment. And so the theory of inverse proportionality holds, at least in part.
However, there are also many cases—in Nigeria and elsewhere—in which the theory does not hold. Having now run out of space, I will have to defer discussion of these cases till next Sunday.
That is the way of unifying theories; they take time, that’s why Einstein died still trying. See you next Sunday.
Source: Punch
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